Uncomfortable

Right now I am sitting here in this stupid town in this stupid state wishing I was back home. I miss the comfort of being home. I hate not being familiar with my surroundings, I think no matter how long I am here it will never be home and I will always feel awkward.
I hate knowing my family is all together and I am down here alone, I feel so alone down here when David isn't by my side. I understand we are down here because of the Army and he can't be continuously with me, but I also wish he would understand how I feel when he leaves. I'm not saying he should feel guilty for not being next to me just give me a little more attention when he is here. Sometimes when he is here he still seems distant, I think he is getting ready for when he is deployed. Maybe he thinks if he trys not to care as much it won't hurt as bad being away.
I am in my 2nd trimester now and still puke occasionally. Hopefully the icky part of this ends soon.
How is it, that someone can feel alone in a place full of people?

30 weeks left

I can finally tell the world... I am pregnant! Right now I am 10 weeks along. I have outgrown some jeans. I have a belly already, nothing too big though. The baby is due December 9th. I will be coming back to Grand Forks in early October. David leaves for Iraq the beginning of November and I don't want to be alone down here for the delivery so I am coming back early.
I am excited and happy. I think David is happy yet upset that he won't be here. I am going to send him lots of pics and record lots of the baby while he is away.
The one thing I have noticed is that my depression is coming back, I don't really know how to deal with it now. I guess I will just have to cope.
I have fallen in love with someone that I haven't even seen. I have prayed for someone I haven't even touched. I have talked to someone I haven't even heard. I am cherishing someone that has become a part of me.

It's been a while but nothing has happened

Easter has come and gone. My parents and brothers came down. We didn't do much but they said they had a good time. We barbecued on Easter. We also sat out in the sun and enjoyed the day. I don't think we've ever barbecued on Easter before.
I have requested to go straight evenings and 32 hour weeks at work. I guess I'll see how that works.
My allergies have been killing me lately. I might have to get something for them.
When you receive a gift from heaven it is made from love and is meant to be cherished, for GOD is love and gifts received from GOD are great.

Remember...

"As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken, and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend, or maybe even fall in love with them. And you'll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. You just have to live life to the fullest. Tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back."

Missing my bro

Have I ever mentioned how bad it sucks when David is in the field? Well, it really sucks. I have spent the past 2 evenings with Nessa. She is great but difficult to communicate with. We are still looking into getting another puppy. I think it will help with her boredom. Yes, I am concerned about my dog's boredom.
I just got an email from Bobby. He told me how much he loves me and misses me. I started crying and am still... um, well I don't know the emotion I am feeling. I love him so much. I think it's because we are so much alike and many years apart so it's easier for us to get along. I am very grateful to have a loving family and to be so close to my extended family. I feel bad for those that aren't close to their family. I was also very blessed in finding love without any heartbreaks. I really do have a wonderful man. I know he cares and loves me a lot (even when he's not in the mood to show it). Last but not least, I have some wonderful friends. They have my back no matter what. So, to all of you mentioned in this paragraph... I love you all! Thank you for being there for me!
The money issues are getting better, finally some light at the end of this seemingly endless tunnel. I don't want to jinx myself though, we have some work to do on our spending habits.
I have heard that blood is thicker than water... Well I know for a fact that blood is thicker than that beer you share with a stranger. Love you're family unconditionally, because they're there for life.