Life

I am now 23 years old, a mother to a seven month old, and Army wife...... That's my life. Strange how things turn out differently then you envisioned them at a child. I would sit for hours dreaming about my wedding, my career, my house, and my family. I have somewhat the career I envisioned I'm not the NICU RN but I am an LPN and have helped many lives. I am shopping for a dress for my wedding which I have this sick feeling in my gut will never happen and yet I put myself through getting my hopes up and having them crushed. Don't get me wrong I am married to the most wonderful husband, I just regret not having the wonderful wedding. I am living in my own house, definitely not the one I drew floor plans of as a child but it's still my home. My family is exactly what I dreamed. I have a beautiful son and a loving husband and two almost well behaved dogs. The Army is something I never thought about. I never ever imagined being an Army wife or having a husband deployed to a country where people want to kill him. Even though I have often gripped about the Army life I know that when or if we ever leave it I will miss it. I have come accustomed to being 2nd and now 3rd in my husband's life. I know and am proud to say the flag comes first.
As I sit out here on my porch while my son is asleep in his crib and my husband is hopefully sleeping in Iraq I am thankful for what GOD has given me and even though it's not what that 10 year old little girl sitting on her bed in the bedroom she shared with her sister envisioned I am happy with it.
Thank GOD for not letting us determine our own futures...